3 Ways Introverts Can Make Stellar Leaders
A must-read for any of us who have put ourselves in a box as introverts. Our leadership style may not be as brazen, but it works.
The COVID-19 pandemic forced many of us to spend more time alone, certainly with diminished human contact. Our inherent fascination with the complexities of understanding ourselves and understanding others (albeit remotely, now) seem heightened. But an equally inherent tendency is still with us: to manage such complexities by sorting people into simpler but often value-laden categories, better known as stereotypes.
The stereotype of introverts and leadership
And “the problem with stereotypes,” as writer Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie warns us, “is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. They make one story become the only story.” In the literature of leadership, coaching, and consulting, we often encounter the perspective that extroverts are best suited to succeed in people-oriented professions, while introverts would do better working in solitary or “behind the scenes” occupations.
Stereotyping is constricting, as nobody is either/or in any social dimension, but worse, it distorts our perceptions of ourselves, our capacities, and our abilities.
How introverts can lead
Susan Cain’s book, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, is thus a boon to leadership and coaching theory. Drawing on research done with the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (1995) and by the Center for the Applications of Psychological Type (2003), Cain found that one-third to one-half of Americans are introverts, which surprises us only because the “Extrovert Ideal” is publicly so highly valued that introverts feel compelled to pretend to be extroverts in order to be professionally or socially rewarded.
Yet introverts have gifts that serve themselves and others well: e.g., encouraging self-reflection, deepening the connection to self-defined values, and practicing attentive listening. In my work as a Gestalt coach and coach trainer, the key to effective leadership and coaching is something I call awareness Intelligence: interactive ways of being self-aware in the service of others.
If you self-identify as an “introvert” in an “extrovert” field, I assure you that your presence can be powerful and transformative.
How to leverage your introvert strength
1. Hone awareness of your physical and emotional cues.
Even though self-reflection is a normal part of your repertoire, you may overemphasize reasoning while tending to ignore or diminish physical and/or emotional cues. When you’re overstimulated, and haven’t adequate time or space to stop to reflect, you still need to be able to adapt your physical responses appropriately and to know what you and others are feeling in the moment. Here are some ways to ground yourself:
Consider your physical stance and what it signals. Are you standing or sitting upright, or slouched and contracted? Your physical presence makes a strong first impression. You can strengthen your physical stance with mindful breathing or yoga exercises, helping you to feel—and to convey—being centered and calm.
Consider not only what you’ll say, but how you’ll say it as well. Tone, pitch, and speed do have an impact. Introverts tend to think before they speak (a strength!), so use that time to choose how best to deliver your words. Even so, the vocal quality of your words will not matter as much as their alignment with your emotions, your imaginative capacity, and the trustworthiness of the message. Is there congruence between your words, your body language, and your facial expression? If you don’t believe your own words, neither will anyone else.
Emotional intelligence, popularized by Daniel Goleman, has become a recognized “soft skill” in leadership literature. This is the capacity to accurately identify and evaluate emotions in the moment, and to respond appropriately. You need to spend time listening (another introvert strength!) for and identifying the emotions that are driving your own and others’ behavior. For example, if you recognize that it isn’t anger but rather fear that’s driving a fraught conversation, you’ll have a better perspective on how to handle the situation.
2. Allow yourself to experiment . . . even to fail.
Creativity typically happens in environments where trust is high, and where tolerance for experimentation is also high. Though everyone has an innate ability to be creative, few are given the opportunity or the freedom to tap into that gift. The “extrovert ideal” that Cain cites means that the insights and innovations of introverts—who loathe to call attention to themselves and prefer working on their own—often go unspoken or undervalued in organizational situations.
There’s potential empowerment in “trying on” new behaviors and new perspectives, which leads to new possibilities. Introverts tend to be curious and exploratory on their own, and that can be provocatively translated into their interactions with others.
Test yourself in small steps to develop a tolerance for and appreciation of “play.” Brené Brown suggests that creativity rests on one’s capacity for play, vulnerability, and “shame resilience.” Similarly, John Cleese, a founding member of the Monty Python comedy troupe and a management consultant, believes that creativity is “not a talent. It is a way of operating.” It’s a cultivated ability to allow oneself to “play,” especially to play with normative ideas and standards.
When experimenting, be particularly compassionate with yourself and with others. Drawing clear boundaries up front as to what will and will not be asked or done is essential to ensure that “failure” results in new and productive learning experiences.
Monitor your energy. If you find yourself becoming overstimulated or anxious, or if you find yourself losing energy, pause — ask for a moment for reflection.
3. Learn to trust your intuition.
Intuition is the experience of having an idea or visceral sense of a perceived pattern that can serve as an internal guide in moments of uncertainty or rapid change, or that can support effective decision-making when time for analysis is limited. Introverts, who spend much of their time listening to and reflecting on what others have said and done, often have a deeper knowledge base that allows them to synthesize seemingly disparate data patterns.
If you’ve honed your awareness of physical and/or emotional cues, and you’ve engaged in experimentation (even if it’s failed), you’ve begun to enhance your intuitive cognition. You’re “reading” yourself and others with greater sensitivity and empathy, and you’re picking up on cues that are distorted, ignored, or invisible to others.
Introverts seem to have a capacity (perhaps born of their habit of self-reflection) to “hear” not only what everyone else is hearing, but to also tap into different channels of information when scanning their environmental fields. Connecting those data streams—the idiosyncratic and the trending—is something you can offer people as an invitation to resonance and creativity, and a way to energize others toward envisioning a different future.
The Bottom Line
Introverts can be, and are, successful in leadership and coaching positions. Bringing your unique presence to your leadership or coaching situations is your opportunity to create interest and evoke change in your life and in the lives of others. If you’d like to learn more about Gestalt Coaching and Awareness Intelligence, click the button below.
This expert produced this original thought leadership piece free of charge to SheVentures. This expert values educating female entrepreneurs and the SheVentures community. SheVentures is not receiving affiliate compensation from the author/expert. Questions? Contact social@sheventurespodcast.com.
